We Must Grieve

When we experience an injury that potentially limits or ends our ability to perform physical activities, there is a loss of something important that is created.  Whether athlete, weekend warrior, or parent chasing after little ones, there is often a sense of longing for what was once but will no longer be.  Well-meaning friends and family may say that we need to just get over it or find something else to take its place, but that beloved activity was more than just a past-time; it represented, in some ways, the personal power and control over our own bodies that has been taken away.

How HealYourBest Coaching Works

Whether you’re newly injured, preparing for, or recovering from surgery, you need tips and tools to make the healing process easier and less stressful. HealYourBest Certified Wellness Coaching provides the right tools for you at just the right time.  From the moment you decide to invest in this program you will benefit from having an experienced and highly trained guide along during your journey of recovery.  I’ll personalize a program starting with where you are currently, will encourage you as you look at your old story in order to know what to change, and will “walk beside you” as you create your new story of wellness.

What Events Cause Feelings of Loss and Grief?

Sad events can cause sad feelings. But what if a happy event causes sad feelings, is there something wrong with me?

Even events that might seem like positives can cause stress in our lives. An example would be a promotion. Of course there are benefits, but there might also be a loss of free time, loss of anonymity at work, loss of being able to make your own schedule if you are responsible for more projects or more people, etc. The following is a list of events that have been shown to cause stress, and which may provoke feelings of grief and/or loss. If any of these have  happened to you, recently or in the past, perhaps it would help to take some time to explore how they may be affecting your ability to be happy today.

‘Tis the Season to be Lonely

Are the Holidays a Difficult Time for You?

Many people have lost loved ones, relationships, or health throughout the year. Often the first holiday season that comes along without the loved one, or without the ability to do the things you usually enjoy creates a deeper sense of loss than other days. The following article helps many of us realize that it is normal to want to skip the holiday season.

Uh-0h, It’s That Time Again!

By Russell Friedman, Co-founder Grief Recovery Institute

Many Grievers Wish They Could Skip The Holidays And Jump From Late October To Mid-January

I’m Fine… and other lies

QUESTION: Sometimes I tell people “I’m fine” and they don’t believe me. Why not?

ANSWER: Approximately 20% of your ability to communicate is verbal, leaving about 80% as non-verbal. Non-verbal communication includes tone of voice as well as facial and body signals. When our verbal and non-verbal signals don’t match, most people will respond to the non-verbal. So when you lie, most people can SEE it.

A common thread running through many of our articles is the mis-information we were all subjected to about processing the normal emotions caused by loss.

Killer Clichés about Loss

QUESTION: I have heard that it takes 2 years to “get over” the death of a loved one; 5 years to “get over” the death of a parent; and you never “get over” the death of a child. Is this true?

ANSWER: Part of the problem is the phrase “get over.” It is more accurate to say that you would never forget a child who had died, anymore than you would ever forget a parent or a loved one. Another part of the problem is one of those killer clichés we talked about, that time, of itself, is a recovery action. Although recovery from loss does take some time, it is the actions within time that lead to successful recovery.

Grieving Loss of Health?

Injury and illness are losses that may need grieving.

There are at least 43 losses which can produce the range of emotions we call grief. The long list includes:

  • Death of a loved one
  • Divorce or end of a relationships
  • Major financial changes
  • Loss of health

Grief is normal and natural, but many of the ideas we have been taught about dealing with grief are not helpful, for example:

  • Time heals all wounds
  • You must grieve alone
  • Be strong
  • Don’t feel bad
  • Replace the loss
  • Just keep busy

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Clients are Saying…

"Sue was tremendously helpful for me in recovering emotionally from injury. A lifelong athlete, I felt devastated after a knee injury which prevented me from participating in my favorite activities. Sue helped me identify the deeper issues behind this loss, which was critical for my being able to address them and begin the emotional healing process. Sue is an excellent listener and was able to gently guide and encourage me along this path."
-K.S., Private Coaching Client

"Doing meditation and breathing and thinking through the end result was extremely helpful. It put me at ease and I was able to sleep through the night before and relax before I went into the operating room."
- M.B., Prepare for Surgery Client

"Sue did a really good job of making us feel comfortable with the whole process. Very patient with us if we needed more guidance.”
- B.M., Group Coaching Client

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The statements on this website have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. The information contained on this website is for educational purposes only, to help the body heal itself. It is not intended for the treatment, cure, diagnosis, or prevention of any medical condition. Please consult your physician for such advice and before altering the use of medications or any other part of your medical program.

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